My Dating Fail

My Dating Fail

Quite a few years back a long term relationship failed and my ex left me. Whilst that may be the topic of another post, obviously I found myself alone.

Now I know that 25 is by no means old but I’d only ever had two relationships, both of which were long term, so dating wasn’t exactly something I was practiced in.

I met a girl at work on an impromptu night out. We spoke briefly but didn’t exchange numbers or make any plans. All very civilised.

So, I told her friend that I quite liked her and asked for her number. I got home and sent her a text say ‘Hi, lovely to chat earlier, do you fancy a drink sometime?’

I got a ‘Hi, yes that would be nice’ reply soon after and we continued to chat via text. We met the next day with her friend and it was a great evening. Even a bit of a kiss in the car park as we said good night.

A couple of dates followed and we got on really well; which after the way I’d been feeling about the breakup was really needed.

Then it was like the whole schooldays again. We both worked at the same place. Separate companies but the same building. We’d been chatting via text in the morning and she said she’d see me as I left work. As I left I text and she said she was with her workmates in the cafe and to come say hi. This should have been a life lesson. As I got there she looked awkward and made no real attempt to say anything. I grabbed a chair and sat next to her whilst she carried on with her conversation, whilst at no point introducing me or really saying anything to me.

I sat there feeling awful and trying to sum up the courage to think of a reason to leave but my inexperience in these situations kept me glued to the seat.

Eventually I made up a story about needing to be somewhere. I think I was about as convinced as they were! Before walking away and taking a deep breath.

In my head on the way home I was saying ‘never again’ but I’m a man and was a lonely one at that. So she text later and said hi, then the conversation continued. She said she was in town that Saturday. (Note, she didn’t mention me joining) So I stupidly said that I could meet her there.

Saturday arrived and I got ready to go out. It probably worth saying here that when my ex left I’d moved back to my parents for a bit. They saw me leave and I said I’d be back late. I’d arranged with my ‘friend’ that I’d text when I’d managed to park to see where they were. This I did to get no reply. I waited probably 10 minutes before ringing her. (Also a good time to mention that her phone was never out of her hands!)

The phone rang and rang with no voicemail. I now knew I couldn’t ring again as an increasing number of missed calls reeked of desperation. So I sat there for another 30 minutes with no response and in my head starting to panic.

After 45 minutes I knew I couldn’t sit there any longer and headed back to my folks. Now here was another problem. If I went straight back, they’d know something was up. They’d never judge me but even so I didn’t want the embarrassment of having to discuss it. So I found the entrance to a lane near their house. I knew there’d be nobody around there at that time of night so switched everything off and sat there. Now it was November, cold and dark. I got there at about eight thirty and sat until eleven when in my head it felt like a reasonable time to get back.

I got in and they were both in bed so I got a shower (to try and warm up) and headed to bed. At half past eleven I got a text from my ‘friend’ asking if I was going to turn up. I told her that I’d text (and rung) as agreed but hadn’t had an answer. It seems my crystal ball also failed that night too.

She didn’t reply and I never contacted her again.

One of the advantages of texts is that you don’t have to look somebody in the face when you ‘speak’ to them.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Have any of you had a situation similar to this? If so, drop me a comment and let me know how you dealt with it.


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